way more whiny and emo than I intended

I was gonna write a nice long entry about lots of stuff.
But I'm exhausted and crashing. Hard.
[note: this turned out really shitty and emo and I didn't intend it that way. Sorry]

I'm sick of wasting my days off.
I'm sick of fucking scheduling conflicts.
I'm so incredibly sick of never seeing my friends anymore.

It feels like I'm invisible. Like if I didn't send someone a message, they would probably not even think of me and not send me a message. And sometimes, even when I do send a message, I don't get a reply.
Am I invisible? Am I silent?
Do I even exist anymore?

I guess everyone is too busy or something. And I feel like I am always left behind or forgotten.

The other night, I woke up so dizzy I could barely stand up. I wasn't on anything at all so I have no idea why. My ear kinda hurt but then it felt better. I ended up seeing things for that entire morning. And I knew I saw something but when I blinked, whatever it was always disappeared. I don't think it was lack of sleep because I've been sleeping a lot but maybe it was because I forgot to eat that day. And I was probably dehydrated too.

I'm having trouble hanging on to consciousness right now, so I'm probably going to disappear or pass out for a while. Also, this would be unreadable without spellcheck.